This is so true
I hate waiting for your response. Why did you have to say all that to me the other night? Why did it have to affect me like it is? Part of me wants to believe you meant what you said but the other part of me wants to believe you said it just because you were drunk. I want to believe the saying, drunken words are sober thoughts, but I just can’t fully believe it. Why would anyone ever feel that way about me? Especially you. You are way to good for me. I don’t know why I have gotten my hopes up in thinking there’s a chance you truly meant everything you said. I should know it’s too good to be true and I’m just going to get my hopes crushed when you respond, saying that it was all just you being drunk. That there was no truth behind any of it. Yet I still sit here and think about what you said and have this bit of hope that you really meant every word you said and that something amazing will come from it. In the end though, I know I’m getting my hopes up. I just need to give up and live with the fact that all I will ever get is the “easy”, unattractive, no personality, has nothing in common with me guys. Those are the only ones that will ever stick around. That’s all I’m good for. I’ll never have a chance with you, ever. I wish those lucid drunk words you spewed the other night didn’t have me like this and affect me so much. God damn feels. Why do you work when I don’t want you to? I just need to stop trying, give up and come to accept that I will forever be alone or with someone who is nothing I want/treats me like shit, which is what I deserve.
YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW LONG I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS TO APPEAR ON MY DASHBOARD